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A Deeper Conversation With Sage


John realized he was accumulating more and more writing. He wasn’t sure it was making sense or going anywhere, but he decided to try and enjoy the process. He even decided to celebrate in some idiotic sort of way, he had read somewhere that to really liberate one’s voice and creativity you had to gift the creative muse with acknowledgment. He thought for days of a way to celebrate then he decided on the next full moon to drive to the closest hot springs and soak in the water. Who knows maybe he would stir up some experiences to write about? He got a good chuckle out of that one and muttered under his breath, “Be careful what you ask for!”   He had been parked close to the New Mexico – Colorado border and decided to drive to a wild spring in the high desert mountains that he had heard about in his travels. He arrived just before sundown hoping most of the folks would be leaving. Sure enough he was in luck and it may have been due to the long rocky hike up the edge of an old lava flow, as he looked at the terrain he could spot the naturally occurring fault where the earth’s plates were brushing close together forming a pyramid shaped mountain. The break between the plates allowed the water to be heated by some hot magma probably closer to the surface than we might be comfortable with. As John approached the spring the steam was floating up through the vegetation, it was greener here than the surrounding area and there was a distinct sulfur smell in the air. Yes, he had arrived at the fairly secluded mountain spring.   Before long the moon started to peak it’s light up over the surrounding hillside and John decided to settle in for the night. He thought about a campfire and gathered some wood just in case, but the water was too inviting to waste time outside its warm embrace any longer, so he eased into the pool.   John started to reflect…he had spent so much time in the future with his writing that he had lost perspective on what was presently happening on planet earth. He didn’t pay attention to calendars or current events. He was definitely a stranger in a strange land, then he heard Sage speaking to him. Maybe she had been speaking for a while.   “It is a very good thing you are doing for yourself tonight coming here to celebrate your journey as a writer. I hope I am not interrupting you?”   “No, please join me! I fully expected your company and even looked forward to it. I am here to celebrate and work if I need to. I’d like to engage with the energies you have to offer, as well as Mother Earth, Grandmother Moon, Father Sky, and any other ‘peaceful’ energies that want to join in.”   “You deserve a dessert for your efforts, did you bring anything you would like to celebrate with?   “Honestly I’m not much for dessert. The biggest celebration for me would be some hint from you about where I am in the process of telling this story. That would be the sweetest cupcake I could imagine!”   John noticed the water bubbling more in the spring and the temperature got significantly hotter. He volunteered quickly, “If that’s not asking for too much!” For a second he thought he heard a chuckle, but maybe he was imagining things.   Well you do deserve a dessert for your efforts. We still have a long way to go in the story, nevertheless in your last meditation there was the slightest feeling moving through you about not wanting to come back to your body. We want you to know how difficult this embodiment has been for you and want to try to explain some of the feelings you have been having for a long time. We have told you before that you chose to come here this lifetime, to enter this human suit of your own free will and choice. No one forced you to do this. You entered into a contract with your eternal essence to come here and do this work. It is virtually impossible for you to break this contract or not fulfill it. You not only agreed to the contract stating what you needed to come here and accomplish and why. This contract was sealed by you meaning that your brothers and sisters on the other side cannot get involved much more than we have done. We have been trying to stimulate your memory so that you may review the contract and get on with your work. The general information that has been laid out on the outside of the contract is you have agreed to come here and help the human inhabitants of Mother Earth understand their effect on her physical evolution and how this may impact her ability to sustain life moving forward. For some reason you proposed the most compelling appeal to be here at this time. Quite frankly there wasn’t much competition among those on the other side to come back and you were given the opportunity with great relief from all of us. As I mentioned a while back you had not been in human form for a very long time, it was suspected that this embodiment would be difficult for you and it has been. We are sorry for your pain and discomfort, and you have a huge team cheering you on.   John lay back in silence and stared at the moon. He heard another voice deep inside his being that said, “It is a far better thing that I do, than I have ever done.” His mind flashed to the classic by Charles Dickens, Tale of Two Cities. He wondered if Sage would continue and silently asked her to go on.   “We are all being so careful to not give you too much information because if we do we then enter the contract with you. I have strict guidelines to work with and as a voice for Mother Earth I have a huge investment to her and few else - except you have grown on me John River. You have been willing to do this journey alone. The reason you have always felt alone is because you did not enter this life with the normal human karma, you do not have the typical human needs, you do not live life based on normal goals or achievements. You have been waiting for this moment your whole life. If I can offer to help hold you in a warm embrace inside the womb of Mother, maybe you can imagine yourself opening a sealed contract and reading what is inside.”   John got a very strange sensation in his stomach in this moment. He felt sick. It was like something needed to clear out, maybe this was what was blocking him from the memory inside. He quickly leaned out of the pool and tried to throw up, nothing came, but the feeling persisted. He laid back in the water, the sulfur smell got much stronger and his eyes started to burn. He felt like he was hallucinating and things started spinning. He closed his eyes and focused on his breath and mumbled, “Please be gentle and help me remember what I came here to do. I am ready to remember and I celebrate this with you tonight in my most humble approach asking for your help.”   In a slightly deeper voice, maybe the male side of Sage he heard, “My son you honor me by your humble nature. Soak in my healing waters and let us celebrate your awakening. You are starting to clear the blockage inside your physical vessel. I cannot do this for you. I can tell you that there have been those along the way who have been trying to help you with this process. Some of those encounters have been painful, some have been mysterious and others have gone unnoticed. When the seal is removed you will remember what you need to remember, but I caution you once opened it may be your most unpleasant experience yet.   John’s stomach tightened, then his forehead started to burn and for a few moments the sulfur smell was sickening. He thought silently to himself, “This is supposed to be a celebration and I feel like I am dying!”   Then he heard a voice not unlike Bugs Bunny say, “Go ahead and die, it’ll be much easier.”   Instead of being startled, John just leaned back in the water. That voice! It must be the stupid weasel for sure.   But the weasel wouldn’t give up so easily. He said, “Oh, you’re going to ignore me, huh? That’s not so easy.”   John started to whistle the Andy Griffith show theme song. He started to enjoy himself a little too much – possibly? Because in the next instant his forehead felt like it was pierced with a hot sword. It burned and the sulfur smell suddenly had a flesh tinge to it. John screamed, “What the fuck!” And he tried opening his eyes. Everything was a blur and it felt like warm blood flowing into his eyes. He was getting sick and this time threw up just outside the hot spring. He slumped back in thinking he may be fainting, his face dipped into the pool. The water was hot. Was it just hot water flowing into his eyes? He looked around and couldn’t distinguish much and then he saw her.   Maybe it was a shadow of the black woman standing behind him. Was it a shadow, or his imagination? He remembered her striking him with her tongue once before. He mumbled, “No!”   He slid deeper into the water and did his best pirouette gently turning to face the goddess creature. He hesitated to think of her as a woman or goddess for that matter. He wanted to label her as a witch, but maybe she held some key. He figured it was time to get to the bottom of this mystery. With his vision still blurry he squinted to make out her features. The more he focused the less he could see. He reached up to touch his forehead, it was sticky and he thought he saw a long tongue slither out into the moonlight. His brain was about to explode!   John felt some anger rising up and he knew he better be careful, so he politely said, “I thought you owed me a debt and were here to protect me? May I humbly ask why I feel pain every time you show up?”   The black goddess witch-like being just starred at him, possibly flicking her tongue in a quick gesture like trying to catch a droplet of something slipping off of her lips.   John said, “Look if you are here to help me, let’s get started. If you can speak please do so and tell me who you are and what you’re to help me with!”   Nothing.   John tried again, “Please tell me who you are!”   Still nothing.   John stood up to get a closer look at this creature and she conveniently shifted forms into the weasel, John just did his best slither back into the water.   The weasel, never short on words said, “Sorry about that, but you really should make sure who you’re talking to next time.”   “I’m never sure who I’m talking to, that’s the whole point to this mess! I wish someone would tell me what the hell has been going on in my life – forever! Generally you’re the smart ass, but I never thought you were the black creature. I don’t understand how she is protecting me. Are you her? Who is she? Who are you?” John rapidly asked.   “Slow down cowboy,” the weasel warned, “Remind me again why you’re here tonight?”   “I came here to celebrate my writing, I mean that was an option I was thinking about. I also wanted to get back in the hot water on the full moon to...”   “See if anything would happen. Be careful for what you wish for, although you were approaching in a much more open way. Why do you think you’ve manifested this encounter tonight?”   “I have no idea. I guess it’s time.”   “No, you have an idea. Now you have to start to string the pieces together.”   “Okay, there must be a connection between you, the black goddess, pain, sarcasm, my forehead, maybe owls and Mother Earth.”   “Bingo! Now we’re getting somewhere.”   “And hot springs, full moons, death, and did I say pain?” John was lightening up.   “And what’s the connection? Weasel asked, “You have to string the pieces together!”   “Well, there must be some connection to my forehead, pain, the black witch and possibly the seal. Or is it getting sick because of pain in my stomach and forgetting everything I could possibly remember because I’m having a lousy conversation with a weasel.”   “I’m a ferret. I’m helping you ferret out your memory.”   “Okay, I’ll accept that. Please forgive me for reacting to your remarks and creating a block to your ferreting. I need all the help I can get. I’m ready to remember my memory. Hallelujah!”